Fault vs. Responsibility

In the complex emotional hellscape of scam recovery, few concepts are as misunderstood as the difference between fault and responsibility.

For victims, the journey to healing is often stalled at this critical crossroads of misunderstanding. It is a foundational truth that the victim of a scam bears no fault for what happened. They made a mistake, yes, of talking to a stranger, but that is just that, a mistake. The fault lies entirely with the criminal perpetrator, the malicious actor who intentionally set out to deceive, manipulate, control, and exploit. This is not a debatable point; it is a legal, moral, and ethical certainty.

However, a dangerous and pervasive misconception has taken root, one that equates being “not at fault” with being “not responsible.” This false equation is a major obstacle to recovery, as it creates a passive mindset that robs the victim of their agency and prevents them from taking the necessary steps to reclaim their life.

The distinction is critical. Fault is about blame for a past event. It is a judgment on the cause of the harm. In a scam, the cause is the scammer’s deceit. The victim was the target of a crime, not the author of it.

Responsibility, on the other hand, is about ownership of the present and the future. It is about accountability for one’s actions, choices, and responses moving forward. To be absolved of fault is not to be absolved of the responsibility to heal. A person who is diagnosed with a serious illness is not at fault for their disease, but they are responsible for following their treatment plan, attending appointments, and making lifestyle changes to facilitate their recovery. The same principle applies to the trauma of a scam.

Believing that being faultless also means being free from responsibility can lead to a state of victimhood (disorder) that becomes a permanent identity. If the victim sees themselves as having no role to play or responsibility in their own recovery, they will remain passive, waiting for an external force to fix the damage.

They may expect law enforcement to solve everything, or for the support provider to magically erase their pain. This passivity is a form of self-sabotage. It prevents the victim from engaging in the difficult but essential work of processing grief, learning to manage trauma and the complexity of their own psychology, how to recover, remain safe, and rebuilding their financial stability. Without taking responsibility for these tasks, the victim remains stuck, their future held hostage by a past they were not at fault in creating but are now responsible for navigating.

Embracing responsibility is an act of strength. It is the moment the victim shifts from asking, “Why did this happen to me?” to asking, “What can I do now?” It is the recognition that while they did not choose to be deceived, they can choose how they respond. They can choose to seek therapy, they can actively participate and engage in a support and recovery program, to share their story, to learn about financial literacy, and to slowly rebuild their trust in the world. This is not about blaming the victim for their experience; it is about crediting them with the strength to overcome it. True healing begins when a person can hold two truths in their mind at once: “It was not my fault, and my recovery is my responsibility.” This shift from a passive victim to an active survivor is the cornerstone of reclaiming one’s life and ensuring that the crime, while not their fault, does not control their future.

Prof. Tim McGuinness, Ph.D.
November 2025