Scam Victim Recovery Insights
From the SCARS Institute
Two Types of Pride
Pride is a complex and often misunderstood emotion, existing as a double-edged sword with two distinct forms: Authentic pride and hubristic pride.
These two types have vastly different origins and effects, and they play a profound and often conflicting role in the recovery of a scam victim. Understanding the difference between accomplishment-based pride and arrogance-based pride is crucial for navigating the path from shame to resilience.
Authentic Pride is the positive, accomplishment-based emotion. It is the quiet, internal satisfaction that comes from recognizing your own effort, growth, and achievement. For a scam victim, this form of pride is the bedrock of a healthy recovery. It manifests in small but significant victories: the pride in finally understanding the psychological tactics used against them; the pride in setting a boundary with a manipulative person; the pride in making it through a day without being consumed by intrusive thoughts; or the pride in reaching out for help when it feels impossible. This pride is not loud or boastful. It is a deep, stabilizing force that says, “I am doing the hard work, and I am making progress.” It builds self-esteem from the ground up, replacing the shame of “I was a victim” with the strength of “I am a survivor.” This accomplishment-based pride fosters humility and a growth mindset, empowering the victim to see their recovery not as a single event, but as a continuous series of earned victories.
In stark contrast, Hubristic Pride is the negative, arrogance-based emotion. It is an inflated, unstable, and often defensive sense of self-worth that is not rooted in actual accomplishment but in a fragile ego. For a scam victim, hubristic pride is a dangerous trap and a common defense mechanism against overwhelming shame. It manifests as a defiant refusal to accept any responsibility for their vulnerability. This is the victim who boasts, “I’m too smart to ever fall for something like that again,” not because they have educated themselves, but because admitting they were once fooled is too painful. This arrogance-based pride is a shield, but it’s a brittle one. It prevents genuine learning because the victim believes they have nothing left to learn. It can also manifest as an aggressive distrust of everyone, a “know-it-all” attitude that pushes away potential support and isolates the victim, cementing them in a state of lonely, defensive anger. This pride doesn’t build resilience; it builds a wall around the trauma, ensuring it can never be properly processed.
The influence of these two types of pride on recovery is a story of divergence. Authentic pride is the engine of healing. It is earned, it is humble, and it connects the victim to their own strength and to others. It allows them to say, “I was fooled, and that is a painful part of my story, but I am proud of the person I am becoming as I heal.” Hubristic pride, on the other hand, is an anchor that keeps the victim stuck. It is unearned, it is arrogant, and it isolates them. It forces them to say, “I was not really fooled, I was just… temporarily distracted,” a denial that prevents them from ever truly confronting the reality of their experience.
Ultimately, the journey of recovery can be seen as a transition from one form of pride to the other. It is the difficult process of letting go of the false, defensive armor of hubristic pride and doing the slow, painstaking work of building genuine, authentic pride, one hard-won accomplishment at a time.
Prof. Tim McGuinness, Ph.D.
December 2025
This is but one component, one piece of the puzzle …
Understanding how the human mind is manipulated and controlled involves recognizing that the tactics employed by deceivers are multifaceted and complex. This information is just one aspect of a broader spectrum of vulnerabilities, tendencies, and techniques that permit us to be influenced and deceived. To grasp the full extent of how our minds can be influenced, it is essential to examine all the various processes and functions of our brains and minds, methods and strategies used the criminals, and our psychological tendencies (such as cognitive biases) that enable deception. Each part contributes to a larger puzzle, revealing how our perceptions and decisions can be subtly swayed. By appreciating the diverse ways in which manipulation occurs, we gain a more comprehensive understanding of the challenges we face in avoiding deception in its many forms.
“Thufir Hawat: Now, remember, the first step in avoiding a *trap* – is knowing of its existence.” — DUNE
“If you can fully understand your own mind, you can avoid any deception!” — Tim McGuinness, Ph.D.
“The essence of bravery is being without self-deception.” — Pema Chödrön
