Scam Victim Recovery Insights
From the SCARS Institute
Make Your Recovery A Priority
The word “priority” is one of the most overused and misunderstood terms in our vocabulary. We casually list our priorities: health, family, career, and recovery, as if naming them is enough. But a priority is not a statement of intent; it is a declaration of action. It is not something you pencil into your schedule if you find a spare moment; it is the non-negotiable anchor around which your schedule is built. What you genuinely care about, you show up for every single day, without excuse. A priority is not a fair-weather friend who appears only when conditions are convenient; it is the first responder who shows up in the storm, the rain, and the dark.
The true test of a priority is not what you say it is, but what your actions prove it to be. If fitness is a priority, you find a way to the gym on the day you’d rather do anything else. If your family is a priority, you put down the phone and engage when you are exhausted. Your priorities find a way. They navigate around obstacles, reschedule other commitments, and demand your focus, especially when it is difficult. If you only engage with something when you feel motivated, when the timing is right, or when it’s easy, then it is a hobby or a preference, not a priority. It is an option on a menu, not the foundation of your structure.
This principle is perhaps nowhere more critical than in the recovery from a traumatic scam.
The aftermath of a scam is a tangled mess of grief, shame, and neurological rewiring that does not heal on its own. It requires active, consistent, and very often uncomfortable work. If you do not prioritize your recovery, you are not just delaying it; you are condemning yourself to a life sentence of its lingering effects. You will still be fighting the same battles with shame and blame in five years, and you will still be working on it in ten. The trauma will not simply fade with time; it will solidify, becoming the unshakable baseline of your life.
Prioritizing your recovery means showing up for it every day. It means dedicating 15 minutes to a therapeutic exercise when you’d rather scroll social media or watch TV. It means joining that call to a support group when you feel the urge to isolate. It means consciously challenging a negative thought pattern, even when it feels easier to just believe it. It means reading an article, one chapter of a book on trauma, or listening to a podcast or audiobook that offers guidance. These are not grand, heroic gestures. They are small, consistent actions taken on the days you don’t want to, the days you’re tired, and the days you feel hopeless. That is what makes it a priority.
To not prioritize your recovery is to passively allow the scam to continue its work long after the criminal is gone. It is to choose a permanent state of reaction over a temporary period of proaction. The choice is yours. You can treat your healing as a convenience, forever pushing it off for a tomorrow that never quite arrives, or you can treat it as the priority it must be. You can show up for yourself every day, and in doing so, build a future defined not by the trauma you endured, but by the strength you forged in the process of reclaiming your own life.
This same principle is the very foundation of the SCARS Institute. We do not treat this work as a hobby or a side project; we have prioritized it with everything we have. There are days when we would love to take a break, days when the weight of the stories we hear is immense, but we show up anyway. We fund this mission ourselves and volunteer our time because we have made supporting and educating scam victims our non-negotiable priority. We do our best to provide the unwavering truth, even when people hate us for it, because we know that false comfort is a dead end. Our team is human too; we get tired, we feel the frustration, and we carry the emotional burden of this work. But we are here every day, standing with you, because we have made you our priority. We lead by example, showing up consistently so that you can see what is possible when you make your own recovery the most important commitment in your life.
Prof. Tim McGuinness, Ph.D.
December 2025
This is but one component, one piece of the puzzle …
Understanding how the human mind is manipulated and controlled involves recognizing that the tactics employed by deceivers are multifaceted and complex. This information is just one aspect of a broader spectrum of vulnerabilities, tendencies, and techniques that permit us to be influenced and deceived. To grasp the full extent of how our minds can be influenced, it is essential to examine all the various processes and functions of our brains and minds, methods and strategies used the criminals, and our psychological tendencies (such as cognitive biases) that enable deception. Each part contributes to a larger puzzle, revealing how our perceptions and decisions can be subtly swayed. By appreciating the diverse ways in which manipulation occurs, we gain a more comprehensive understanding of the challenges we face in avoiding deception in its many forms.
“Thufir Hawat: Now, remember, the first step in avoiding a *trap* – is knowing of its existence.” — DUNE
“If you can fully understand your own mind, you can avoid any deception!” — Tim McGuinness, Ph.D.
“The essence of bravery is being without self-deception.” — Pema Chödrön
