Monsters of the ‘ID’: How Scam Victims’ Own Emotions Can Sabotage Their Recovery
Overcoming Anger, Shame, and Desperation to Take Back Control After Being Scammed
Primary Category: Scam Victim Recovery Psychology
Intended Audience: Scam Victims-Survivors / Family & Friends
Authors:
• Vianey Gonzalez B.Sc(Psych) – Licensed Psychologist Specialty in Crime Victim Trauma Therapy, Neuropsychologist, Certified Deception Professional, Psychology Advisory Panel & Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
• Tim McGuinness, Ph.D. – Anthropologist, Scientist, Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
About This Article
Scam victims often face not just financial and emotional loss but also internal psychological battles that can hinder their recovery. The concept of Monsters of the Id, originating from Freudian psychology, represents the primal, unfiltered impulses that can drive victims to act irrationally. Modern psychology identifies these impulses as emotional dysregulation, cognitive distortions, and trauma responses—each of which can lead to impulsive decisions, self-blame, or paranoia that isolates victims from the support they need.
Uncontrolled anger, shame, and desperation can turn victims into their own worst enemies, leading them to lash out, withdraw, or make reckless choices in an attempt to regain control. Recognizing when these psychological forces are at play is essential to preventing self-sabotage. Victims must ask themselves whether their decisions are being driven by raw emotion rather than rational thought.
Strategies such as pausing before acting, seeking professional guidance, and focusing on long-term recovery can help victims regain stability. True recovery is not just about seeking justice—it is about mastering emotional impulses, restoring confidence, and making thoughtful decisions that lead to healing and security.
Monsters of the Mind: How Scam Victims’ Own Emotions Can Sabotage Their Recovery
Overcoming Anger, Shame, and Desperation to Take Back Control After Being Scammed
Monsters of the Id – an Introduction
The concept of ‘Monsters of the Id’ originates from psychology and science fiction, referring to destructive impulses and fears that originate from the unconscious mind when placed under unbearable stress. The term is rooted in Freudian psychoanalysis, where the ‘id’ represents the primal, instinctual part of the psyche that houses desires, aggression, and repressed urges.
The phrase gained prominence through the 1956 sci-fi film ‘Forbidden Planet’ [we highly recommend it,] where an advanced alien civilization was destroyed by its own subconscious fears and desires made manifest. In a psychological context, Monsters of the Id symbolize how repressed emotions—such as anger, guilt, or trauma—can emerge in destructive ways if not properly understood or managed.
This concept is often explored in literature, psychology, and criminal behavior studies, particularly in how suppressed impulses can lead to irrational or harmful actions.
While it is not so much in fashion in psychology, it is a very useful and relatable concept that most people can understand.
Scam Victims
Scam victims face an uphill battle in recovering from fraud, not just financially but emotionally and psychologically. While the external damage of being scammed is evident, the internal struggle is often just as severe. One of the greatest threats to a victim’s recovery is not just the scammer but their own mind—specifically, the unfiltered, unrestrained impulses that emerge from deep within. This phenomenon, sometimes referred to as monsters of the Id, can lead scam victims to make irrational, self-destructive decisions that hinder their ability to heal and seek justice effectively.
Understanding how these psychological forces operate and recognizing when they are in control is essential for scam victims to regain stability and move forward. In this article, we will explore the origins of the Id, its modern psychological equivalents, and the ways in which scam victims may fall prey to their own destructive impulses. We will also outline how victims can recognize when their inner monsters are in control and how they can regain rationality before making decisions that worsen their situation.
Understanding the ‘Id’ and Its Modern Equivalents
The concept of the Id comes from Sigmund Freud’s model of the human psyche, which is divided into three parts:
The Id – The primitive, impulsive, and instinct-driven part of the mind that seeks immediate gratification without concern for consequences. It is the seat of anger, fear, and desire.
The Ego – The rational part of the psyche that mediates between the Id’s desires and reality.
The Superego – The moral compass, representing internalized societal norms and values.
Freud’s theory suggests that when the Id is left unchecked, it can manifest in self-destructive behaviors. While the terminology has evolved, modern psychology still recognizes the impact of unchecked impulses. Today, we see parallels in concepts such as:
Emotional Dysregulation – The inability to manage intense emotions, leading to impulsive decisions.
Cognitive Distortions – Irrational thought patterns that reinforce negativity, such as blaming oneself or assuming all people are untrustworthy.
Trauma Responses – Emotional overreactions stemming from past experiences, including the fight-or-flight response.
When scam victims suffer a major emotional shock, the Id—or its modern equivalents—can take over, leading to impulsive, irrational, and often harmful reactions.
Emotional Dysregulation: When Intense Emotions Take Over
One of the most immediate psychological challenges scam victims face is emotional dysregulation—the inability to manage overwhelming emotions in a controlled, rational way. The shock, anger, and devastation of realizing they have been deceived can send victims into an emotional freefall, leading to impulsive decisions that often make the situation worse. Emotional dysregulation occurs when the brain prioritizes raw feelings over logical thinking, making it difficult for victims to weigh their options carefully.
This can manifest in several ways. Some victims lash out at those around them, directing their anger at family, friends, or even law enforcement officials who may not be able to provide immediate solutions. Others spiral into panic, desperately trying to “fix” the situation by making hasty financial or legal decisions, such as taking out loans to recover lost money or engaging with scam recovery fraudsters who promise to retrieve their stolen funds for a fee. Emotional dysregulation can also lead to self-destructive behaviors like excessive drinking, reckless spending, or avoidance of responsibilities.
Victims trapped in this state often feel like their emotions are controlling them rather than the other way around. The key to overcoming emotional dysregulation is recognizing when emotions are running unchecked and taking steps to regain balance. This may include deep breathing exercises, journaling, or delaying important decisions until the initial emotional storm has settled. The goal is to shift from reactionary behavior to thoughtful, measured responses that prioritize long-term recovery.
Cognitive Distortions: The Mind’s Trap of Negativity
After experiencing fraud, scam victims are especially vulnerable to cognitive distortions—irrational thought patterns that reinforce negativity and make it harder to move forward. These distortions shape the way victims interpret their experiences, often in ways that are exaggerated or untrue. One of the most common distortions among scam victims is self-blame, where they convince themselves that being scammed was entirely their fault. Thoughts like “I was so stupid to fall for this” or “I should have known better” create a cycle of shame that prevents victims from seeking help.
Another damaging distortion is the assumption that all people are untrustworthy. After being deceived, many victims begin to view the entire world through the lens of betrayal, believing that no one can be trusted—not financial institutions, law enforcement, advocacy groups, or even loved ones. This mindset can isolate victims, making it harder for them to accept support and guidance from those who genuinely want to help.
Cognitive distortions also feed into catastrophic thinking, where victims assume the worst-case scenario about their future. They may believe they will never recover financially, that they will always be a target for scams, or that they will never be able to trust anyone again. These distortions, while powerful, are not grounded in reality. Overcoming them requires actively challenging negative thoughts, reframing perspectives, and seeking factual, logical insights to replace exaggerated fears with balanced reasoning. Victims who recognize these distortions can take back control over their mindset and work toward recovery with a more constructive approach.
Trauma Responses: When Past Pain Amplifies Present Reactions
For many scam victims, the emotional fallout of fraud is not just about the immediate loss—it triggers deeper, unresolved trauma from past experiences. This can lead to heightened trauma responses, where the body and mind react as if they are in a life-or-death situation. One of the most well-known trauma responses is the fight-or-flight reaction, in which the body is flooded with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, preparing for survival. Scam victims may experience this as a rush of panic, anger, or a desperate need to take action—whether that action is helpful or not.
Some victims fall into the fight mode, aggressively seeking revenge on the scammer, confronting people they believe are responsible, or attempting to take justice into their own hands. Others enter flight, where they withdraw from the situation entirely, avoiding phone calls, ignoring financial problems, or refusing to report the crime out of fear or embarrassment. A third response, freeze, can leave victims feeling emotionally numb, unable to take any action at all, stuck in a cycle of despair and inaction.
The intensity of these trauma responses can be confusing and overwhelming, especially for victims who have never experienced something similar before. Recognizing these reactions as trauma-related, rather than as rational conclusions, can help victims regain perspective. Grounding techniques—such as breathing exercises, speaking with a trusted support system, and seeking professional counseling—can help regulate these responses so that victims can move forward in a way that is thoughtful and productive rather than driven by emotional survival instincts.
Understanding emotional dysregulation, cognitive distortions, and trauma responses is key for scam victims looking to regain control over their recovery. By identifying when these psychological forces are at play, victims can take proactive steps to manage their emotions, challenge irrational thoughts, and ensure that their responses are guided by logic and long-term well-being rather than immediate emotional impulses.
How Scam Victims Become Their Own Worst Enemy
After being scammed, a victim’s emotions become a battlefield. Anger, shame, grief, and despair collide, making rational thinking difficult. This creates fertile ground for the monsters of the Id to emerge. Here are some of the most common ways scam victims can become their own worst enemy:
Uncontrolled Anger and Revenge Fantasies
One of the strongest emotional responses after being scammed is rage. The desire for revenge, justice, or to make the scammer suffer is overwhelming. While this anger is understandable, it often leads victims to act recklessly:
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- Engaging in online vigilantism, which can result in legal trouble.
- Lashing out at law enforcement or financial institutions rather than working with them.
- Publicly exposing scammers in ways that could lead to further harassment.
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Victims may believe that unleashing their fury will provide relief, but it often backfires, leading to more stress and fewer productive results.
Destructive Self-Blame and Shame
On the other end of the spectrum, some victims turn their anger inward. They berate themselves for being “stupid” or “gullible,” convincing themselves that they deserved to be scammed. This internalized rage leads to:
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- Avoiding seeking help out of embarrassment.
- Withdrawing from loved ones and isolating themselves.
- Falling into depression or anxiety, making recovery even harder.
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Shame is one of the most paralyzing emotions for scam victims. When the monster of self-blame takes over, it stops victims from taking action to recover.
Irrational Financial or Legal Decisions
A scam victim in crisis may feel compelled to take extreme, impulsive actions to fix the situation immediately. These often lead to even worse consequences, such as:
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- Taking out risky loans or gambling to recover lost money.
- Falling for “recovery scams” that promise to get their money back for a fee.
- Filing false police reports in desperation, which can lead to legal trouble.
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These desperate reactions are the result of fear-driven thinking. When a victim is ruled by their emotions instead of logic, they are more likely to fall for further deception.
Distrusting Everyone and Pushing Away Support
After being scammed, many victims develop an extreme distrust of people, believing that everyone is a potential threat. While some skepticism is healthy, victims who become overly distrustful may:
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- Reject help from legitimate victim advocacy groups.
- Refuse to report the scam to authorities because they assume no one will help.
- Cut off friends and family who try to offer emotional support.
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This paranoia creates a self-imposed prison where the victim isolates themselves instead of accepting help. In reality, recovery often requires working with others to find solutions.
How to Know If Your Inner Monsters Are in Control
Recognizing when the monsters of the Id are in control is the first step toward regaining rationality. Scam victims should ask themselves the following questions:
- Am I making decisions based on anger, fear, or desperation rather than careful thinking?
- Have I considered the long-term consequences of my actions, or am I reacting impulsively?
- Am I blaming myself in a way that prevents me from seeking help?
- Am I shutting out people who genuinely want to help me?
- Do I feel like I am spiraling into deeper negativity rather than working toward a solution?
If the answer to any of these is yes, it is likely that emotions—not rational thinking—are in control.
How to Regain Control and Overcome the Monsters Within
Pause and Breathe – When emotions are overwhelming, stop and take deep breaths. Give yourself time to think before making any major decisions.
Seek Professional Guidance – Consult scam victim advocacy groups, financial advisors, or mental health professionals who can provide clarity and rational options.
Write It Down – Journaling thoughts and emotions can help separate rational concerns from irrational impulses.
Talk to Someone You Trust – Speaking with a friend or support group can help put emotions into perspective.
Avoid Impulsive Actions – If an action feels like an immediate reaction to pain or anger, delay it and reassess later.
Shift Focus to Recovery – Instead of dwelling on the scam itself, focus on actionable steps such as securing accounts, reporting the crime, and seeking emotional healing.
Winning the Battle Against the Inner Monsters
The greatest danger scam victims face is often not just the scam itself, but their own emotional response to it. When anger, shame, and desperation take over, rational thinking is replaced by destructive behaviors that can worsen the situation. By understanding the concept of monsters of the Id and recognizing when they are in control, victims can take steps to regain rationality and make informed decisions.
Recovery is not about getting justice—it’s about healing, regaining confidence, and ensuring that emotional impulses do not create further damage. By mastering their inner battles, scam victims can reclaim control of their lives and move forward toward a healthier, more secure future.
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Important Information for New Scam Victims
- Please visit www.ScamVictimsSupport.org – a SCARS Website for New Scam Victims & Sextortion Victims
- SCARS Institute now offers a free recovery program at www.SCARSeducation.org
- Please visit www.ScamPsychology.org – to more fully understand the psychological concepts involved in scams and scam victim recovery
If you are looking for local trauma counselors please visit counseling.AgainstScams.org or join SCARS for our counseling/therapy benefit: membership.AgainstScams.org
If you need to speak with someone now, you can dial 988 or find phone numbers for crisis hotlines all around the world here: www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines
A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.
These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.
Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at www.ScamPsychology.org
SCARS Resources:
- Getting Started: ScamVictimsSupport.org
- FREE enrollment in the SCARS Institute training programs for scam victims SCARSeducation.org
- For New Victims of Relationship Scams newvictim.AgainstScams.org
- Subscribe to SCARS Newsletter newsletter.againstscams.org
- Sign up for SCARS professional support & recovery groups, visit support.AgainstScams.org
- Find competent trauma counselors or therapists, visit counseling.AgainstScams.org
- Become a SCARS Member and get free counseling benefits, visit membership.AgainstScams.org
- Report each and every crime, learn how to at reporting.AgainstScams.org
- Learn more about Scams & Scammers at RomanceScamsNOW.com and ScamsNOW.com
- Learn more about the Psychology of Scams and Scam Victims: ScamPsychology.org
- Self-Help Books for Scam Victims are at shop.AgainstScams.org
- Worldwide Crisis Hotlines: International Suicide Hotlines – OpenCounseling : OpenCounseling
- Campaign To End Scam Victim Blaming – 2024 (scamsnow.com)
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this and other SCARS articles are intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
Note about Mindfulness: Mindfulness practices have the potential to create psychological distress for some individuals. Please consult a mental health professional or experienced meditation instructor for guidance should you encounter difficulties.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here
If you are in crisis, feeling desperate, or in despair please call 988 or your local crisis hotline.
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Please share your thoughts in a comment below!
Excelente articulo. El equilibrio en la tríada del ello, el yo y el superyó, según la teoría psicoanalítica de Sigmund Freud, es fundamental para el funcionamiento psicológico saludable. Cada uno de estos componentes representa aspectos distintos de la personalidad, y su interacción armoniosa es clave para el bienestar mental, este equilibrio entre el ello, el yo y el superyó es esencial para una personalidad integrada y adaptativa. Permite vivir de manera satisfactoria, considerando tanto los impulsos internos como las exigencias del mundo exterior.
The monsters of the Id that every fraud victim faces to a greater or lesser degree.
How to overcome them and not let them sabotage our recovery.
Great, very helpful article-a must-read for everyone.
This is a valuable article. It is a real life battle and I trust this will encourage victims to realise healing is possible, overcoming the past is possible and the moments you have on earth is more precious than what happened in the past.
Thank you for the message of encouragement in thid article