Betrayal – The Deepest Wound, The Strongest Trauma – For Scam Victims

Betrayal is Treachery Against Those They Owed the Most Loyalty

Primary Category: Philosophy of Scam Victimization

Author:
•  Tim McGuinness, Ph.D. – Anthropologist, Scientist, Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.

About This Article

Betrayal is one of the most psychologically damaging experiences a person can endure, especially when it comes from someone who claimed to love or care for you. In Dante’s Inferno, betrayal is placed in the deepest circle of Hell for a reason. It violates the most sacred bonds: trust, loyalty, and love. Scam victims know this all too well. What begins as a promise of connection or affection often ends in emotional devastation, confusion, and shame. The betrayal feels personal, and its impact can shake your very identity. Many victims are left not only questioning the scammer’s actions, but also doubting their own judgment, worth, and emotional truth.

This is not just a loss of money. It is a collapse of emotional reality. It is why trauma from scams is so deep and lasting. Recovery requires more than just time. It requires the courage to name what happened, seek support, and learn what went wrong. Without action, the trauma grows and spreads into other parts of your life. But when you recognize betrayal for what it is, and you begin to heal through therapy, support, and education, you stop being a victim. You become someone who understands what was taken, and who is ready to take your life back.

Note: This article is intended for informational purposes and does not replace professional medical advice. If you are experiencing distress, please consult a qualified mental health professional.

Betrayal – Treachery Against Those They Owed the Most Loyalty

Looking at Betrayal

In Dante’s Inferno, betrayal is punished in the ninth and deepest circle of Hell—Cocytus, the frozen lake at the center of the underworld. It is the closest circle to Satan, who himself is depicted as a ‘betrayer’ and is eternally frozen in the ice. This circle is reserved for those who have committed treachery against those to whom they owed the most loyalty: family, homeland, guests, and benefactors. Dante viewed betrayal as the ultimate violation, the most corrosive and inhuman of sins.

This is a fitting entry point for understanding betrayal in scams, especially romance and trust-based scams, where emotional devastation often exceeds financial loss. Scam victims are not just defrauded; they are emotionally betrayed. They are led to believe in a relationship built on love, partnership, or spiritual kinship—something sacred. When that illusion collapses, it is not just the fraud that wounds them. It is the collapse of identity, memory, and moral order.

It is also a fitting place to look at ‘The First Betrayal!’

A Brief Stop in the Hell of Betrayers

Dante Alighieri’s vision of Satan and Hell in Inferno did not emerge in a vacuum. It is a synthesis of Christian theology, classical mythology, medieval cosmology, and Dante’s own imagination. His Divine Comedy—especially Inferno, the first of its three parts—was written in the early 14th century and reflects a worldview shaped by centuries of religious doctrine, Greco-Roman tradition, and scholastic philosophy.

The structure of Dante’s Hell draws heavily from Catholic doctrine, especially ideas developed by Church Fathers like Augustine and Thomas Aquinas. The concept of eternal punishment for sinners, the hierarchy of sins, and the emphasis on free will are all rooted in Christian theology. However, the Bible itself offers only fragmented and symbolic descriptions of Hell. Dante expanded on these, creating a highly structured moral universe.

The depiction of Satan as a fallen angel is based on biblical passages—most notably Isaiah 14:12 (“How you are fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning!”) and Revelation 12:7–9, which describes a war in heaven between Michael and his angels and the dragon, who is cast out. These texts were interpreted by medieval theologians as referring to Satan’s rebellion and fall from grace.

Dante also draws from classical sources, especially Virgil and Ovid. In Inferno, the Roman poet Virgil serves as Dante’s guide, symbolizing reason and classical wisdom. The geography of Hell owes much to Greek and Roman mythology, particularly the idea of the underworld as a structured place with specific regions for different types of souls, as seen in Homer’s Odyssey and Virgil’s Aeneid.

Dante’s vision of the frozen lake Cocytus as the lowest level of Hell is partly adapted from classical descriptions of Hades, where rivers like Styx and Lethe feature prominently. However, the concept of betrayers being punished in ice rather than fire is Dante’s innovation, reflecting his belief that betrayal is a cold and calculated sin.

Dante’s Hell is shaped according to the Ptolemaic model of the universe, with the Earth at the center. Hell is located literally beneath the surface, directly under Jerusalem. It is a vast, funnel-shaped abyss formed when Satan fell from Heaven, crashing into the Earth and displacing matter. Each of the nine circles descends deeper into the earth, with sins worsening as one moves downward. This descending structure reflects a graded moral logic, where sins of incontinence (e.g., lust, gluttony) are punished less severely than sins of fraud or treachery.

Dante’s version of Hell also serves a political and moral function. He places many of his real-life enemies in Hell, including corrupt clergy, political traitors, and others he believed betrayed the ideals of justice and virtue. This personalization of Hell turns Inferno into a critique of his own society, especially the Church and government of Florence, from which he had been exiled.

While Dante built on existing traditions, his genius lay in how he fused them into a single, cohesive moral universe. His Satan—silent, frozen, and chewing endlessly on traitors—is unlike the fire-breathing tempters of later folklore. This Satan represents impotence and despair, not rebellion and rule. Dante’s Hell is not only a place of punishment but a map of the human soul, where every sin corresponds to a perversion of love or reason.

The First Betrayal: Lucifer – Morning Star – Satan

The story of Lucifer and the First Betrayal is one of the most enduring narratives in Judeo-Christian tradition. It is not fully spelled out in a single biblical text, but has been developed through centuries of theological interpretation, apocryphal writings, and literary expansion. At its heart, it is the story of pride, rebellion, and betrayal against divine authority.

According to Christian tradition, Lucifer was once the most radiant of angels. His name means “Light-bringer” or “Morningstar”, and he was created by God to serve, protect, and reflect divine glory. But Lucifer was not content with that role. Over time, pride, ambition, and greed grew in him, twisting his purpose. He wanted more than admiration. He wanted power. He wanted control. He wanted to be God.

This is where the parallel to modern scammers becomes unmistakable.

Who Was Lucifer?

The name Lucifer means “light-bringer” or “morning star.” Originally, it referred to a bright celestial object, typically the planet Venus. In Isaiah 14:12, the King James Bible uses the term in the phrase:

“How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!”

This verse is part of a taunt against the king of Babylon, but later Christian tradition interpreted it as a reference to a fallen angel. Over time, Lucifer became Satan, the adversary and the deceiver of God and humanity.

The First Scammer

Lucifer’s rebellion was not a violent uprising—it was a con. A manipulation of truth, trust, and allegiance. He used persuasion, deception, and manipulation to influence other angels to follow him, luring them into betrayal under the illusion of a better order, a higher cause, or some imagined freedom from divine law. In reality, it was a grab for power. He promised elevation, but delivered ruin. He sold the promise of enlightenment and delivered exile.

Lucifer became the first scammer in the history of creation.

He exploited his beauty, charisma, and position to persuade others to follow him. Like modern scammers, he studied his targets, manipulated emotion, and presented a counterfeit version of reality. He exploited trust. He created a false narrative. And like every scam that followed, his plan was built on theft—stealing authority, stealing loyalty, and ultimately attempting to steal what was never his to begin with: God’s power and dominion.

The Rebellion in Heaven

As elaborated in Revelation 12:7–9, Ezekiel 28, and Isaiah 14, supplemented by works such as Milton’s ‘Paradise Lost’, Lucifer was the most beautiful and powerful of all the angels. He held the highest rank, that of an archangel, and was created by God as a being of immense intelligence, radiance, and splendor.

But Lucifer became prideful. He desired not only to reflect God’s glory, but to possess it. He said in his heart:

“I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God… I will be like the Most High.” (Isaiah 14:13–14)

This pride turned into greed, and that greed into deception. Lucifer persuaded a third of the angels to follow him in challenging God’s supremacy. This moment, when Lucifer sought to overthrow his Creator, is considered the First Betrayal.

The Fall

The rebellion was short-lived. In the Book of Revelation, a great war in Heaven is described:

“Michael and his angels fought against the dragon; and the dragon fought and his angels, and prevailed not… and the great dragon was cast out, that old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan.” (Revelation 12:7–9)

Michael the Archangel, leading the loyal heavenly host, cast Lucifer and his followers down from Heaven. Their fall created Hell—a realm of separation from divine presence and eternal punishment.

The rebellion ended with divine judgment. Archangel Michael and the loyal angels fought back, and Lucifer and his followers were cast out of Heaven. What began as a deception ended in total separation. Lucifer became Satan. His new realm—Hell—was not just a place of fire, but of isolation and loss. His fall was not just punishment. It was the full exposure of a con artist’s nature: empty, defiant, and fundamentally corrupt.

The story of Lucifer reveals the core pattern of betrayal that defines all scams. The betrayer never takes by force alone. He deceives, seduces, and schemes. He promises glory or love or wealth—but only to trap, extract, and discard. His gain is always at the victim’s loss.

This betrayal was not rooted in desperation or survival. It was intentional. Lucifer had perfect knowledge of what he was doing. That is what makes his betrayal so severe. It was a choice to exploit. A decision to manipulate. A willful abuse of trust on a cosmic scale. It is this depth of malice that echoes in every scam where a victim realizes the person they trusted never existed at all.

Lucifer became Satan, the accuser and tempter of mankind. No longer the light-bringer, he became the prince of darkness.

The First Betrayal

Unlike human sin, which can be caused by ignorance or weakness, Lucifer’s betrayal was deliberate, conscious, and absolute. It represents a willful perversion of freedom and is the archetype of all betrayal to follow. This is why, in Dante’s Inferno, the final and deepest circle of Hell is reserved for traitors—and Satan is at its frozen core, eternally chewing on the greatest betrayers in history.

Lucifer’s betrayal was the first in all of creation. It was not just a violation of authority, but a fundamental rupture of order, harmony, and also the first deception, the first scam. Lucifer had perfect knowledge of God, and used that knowledge in an attempt to grab power by scamming the other angels to turn against him, very much like scammers manipulate their victims ti turn against their families and friends. This made his rebellion uniquely unforgivable.

Theological Meaning

The story of Lucifer’s fall is not just myth or metaphor. In Christian beliefs, it illustrates the dangers of pride, the misuse of free will, and the destructive power of betrayal. It also sets the stage for the cosmic struggle between good and evil—a drama that plays out in every soul tempted to defy what they know to be right.

However, Lucifer’s scam did not end with his exile. Christians believe his mission continues to deceive, divide, and destroy, just like modern scammers motivated by control and greed. He remains the original grifter, constantly offering illusions of love, power, and truth. But underneath it all is the same structure every scam follows: a lie wrapped in charm, aimed at stealing what is sacred.

This story is not just theology either. It is a blueprint for manipulation. Lucifer’s fall shows how betrayal begins, not with violence (though scams are ultimately acts of violence), but with persuasion. Not with brute force, but with false promises, manipulation, and control. The angels he swayed were not fools. They were victims of the most skilled deceiver.

Lucifer’s fall is not just a story about the past. It is a warning about what happens when trust is shattered, when ego overrides truth, and when someone with knowledge and power chooses to use it to exploit instead of serve.

Not a Story to Dismiss

For victims of scams, this narrative offers something important. It reveals that betrayal has always been with us. That it is not a mark of stupidity or weakness to fall into a lie. It is something even angels once suffered. And it also reveals that the betrayer, no matter how powerful or convincing, is always the one who ends up trapped by his own deceit, even though they can do incredible damage in their actions.

Lucifer is not a story to simply dismiss. He is the original symbol (the poster child) of what happens when someone weaponizes charm, trust, and half-truths to exploit others for their own gain. Every scam, every betrayal, is a shadow of that first act of betrayal.

And like those who rose to resist him, scam victims are not powerless.

Understanding the pattern does not undo the pain, but it restores your sense of reality. It shows you that this violation did not start with you, and it will not end with you either. But every time you choose truth over illusion, healing over denial, and action over silence, you reclaim what was taken.

Lucifer fell for his betrayal. The scammer will too. And you, like the angels who stood their ground, can rise.

The Story of Iblis in the Qur’an

In the Qur’an, the figure analogous to Lucifer is known as Iblis. His story is central to Islamic theology concerning disobedience, pride, deception, and betrayal.

According to the Qur’an, the story of Iblis comes long after the period when God created the angels.

During the time of Adam (and Eve), He commanded all the angels to bow to Adam as a sign of respect and acknowledgment of Adam’s unique status. All of them obeyed—except Iblis. His refusal was not based on ignorance or misunderstanding, but on arrogance and pride.

“And [mention] when We said to the angels, ‘Prostrate before Adam’; so they prostrated, except for Iblis. He refused and was arrogant and became of the disbelievers.”
(Surah Al-Baqarah 2:34)

Iblis argued that he was superior to Adam because he was made from fire, while Adam was made from clay.

“He said, ‘I am better than him. You created me from fire and created him from clay.'”
(Surah Al-A’raf 7:12)

For his defiance, Iblis was cast out and cursed, but he asked God to delay his punishment until the Day of Judgment. God granted this request, and Iblis vowed to mislead and deceive humans from the straight path.

“[Iblis] said, ‘Because You have put me in error, I will surely sit in wait for them on Your straight path. Then I will come to them from before them and from behind them and on their right and on their left, and You will not find most of them grateful [to You].'”
(Surah Al-A’raf 7:16–17)

Interestingly, the Qur’an makes it clear that Iblis was not an angel, but a jinn, created from smokeless fire (Surah Al-Kahf 18:50). This is a major distinction from the Christian tradition where Lucifer is an archangel. The essence of Iblis’ sin is his pride and refusal to obey God’s command. This is a theological warning in Islam against arrogance and rebellion against divine authority.

Iblis’ betrayal is considered the first act of disobedience against God in the Qur’anic narrative. He is viewed as a deceiver and corrupter—his role is to lead humans astray through whispers (waswasah), doubts, and false promises. Unlike human beings, who are offered guidance and forgiveness, Iblis made a conscious, informed choice to defy God. His punishment is sealed, and he becomes the leader of the damned (Shayatin or devils).

In Islamic theology, Iblis is a model of betrayal through pride. He was given status, knowledge, and proximity to the divine, but chose rebellion. His story reflects the danger of arrogance and the destructive path of manipulating others to validate one’s fall. Like all deceivers, Iblis offers false promises of power, freedom, or knowledge, but only delivers destruction.

For victims of scams, this ancient account of Iblis as the first deceiver offers a parallel: the scammer, like Iblis, presents an illusion that entices through charm or desire, but behind it is pride, deception, and harm. Recognizing the pattern helps reclaim truth.

Understanding Betrayal as a Violation of the Sacred

Betrayal by someone you trusted as a romantic partner, friend, mentor, or spiritual guide is uniquely traumatizing. It creates a rupture that is existential. Scam victims often believed they were engaged in something meaningful and good. They gave generously, emotionally, and often financially, because they thought they were helping someone they loved or someone in need. That generosity, once revealed to have been manipulated, becomes a source of shame and confusion. Victims are left wondering how their best intentions were weaponized against them.

This kind of betrayal—done in the name of “love,” “helping,” or even a shared spiritual mission—destroys a person’s sense of moral coherence. They are forced to question not only the scammer’s intentions but their own: Was I foolish? Was my kindness wrong? Is my capacity for love dangerous? This self-questioning can become corrosive if not addressed in recovery.

The High Ground Deception

What intensifies trauma further is when betrayal is framed as being for the victim’s own good. Some scammers will say, “I needed the money to survive,” or “I really did love you, but I had no choice.” These narratives twist morality, confusing the victim into thinking the betrayal was somehow justified. It taps into a deep psychological vulnerability: the belief that suffering can be part of love or moral purpose.

This kind of “betrayal cloaked in virtue” echoes the most tragic forms of deception. When someone acts under the illusion that they are doing good, or convinces you that they are doing good, they leave you with no solid emotional ground. You were not just lied to; you were recruited into a lie and made to feel responsible for its outcome.

In religious or philosophical terms, this is why Dante placed betrayers in the deepest circle of Hell. They do not simply harm the body or the bank account. They desecrate trust itself, and they pervert the highest virtues, faith, loyalty, and compassion, into instruments of destruction.

Betrayal Trauma: What It Is Psychologically and Neurologically

Betrayal trauma is a deeply disruptive form of trauma (some say the worst) that occurs when someone you depend on for safety, trust, or emotional connection violates that trust. This may be a partner, family member, friend, or someone in a position of power. In the case of scam victims, betrayal trauma often comes from someone who pretended to care, manipulated emotional vulnerabilities, and then exploited those connections for personal gain. The pain is not just from the loss or the lie. It is from the collapse of the emotional structure that you thought you could trust.

Psychological Impact

Psychologically, betrayal trauma strikes at the core of your identity and sense of security. The effects often resemble those seen in other types of trauma, but with additional complexity tied to the relationship. Unlike an impersonal trauma (like a car crash), betrayal trauma often involves attachment rupture, emotional confusion, and self-blame.

Common psychological symptoms include:

Dissociation: To protect yourself from the emotional overload, your mind may detach from the experience. This can manifest as memory gaps, feeling emotionally numb, or having difficulty connecting thoughts to feelings.

Anxiety and Hypervigilance: After betrayal, your nervous system can remain on alert. You may constantly scan for signs of further danger, even when there is none.

Shame and Self-Doubt: Betrayal by someone you trusted can lead to internalized blame. Victims may think, “How did I fall for this?” or “What does this say about me?”

Loss of Identity: Many scam victims report not knowing who they are anymore. Their values, routines, and self-perception may feel destabilized.

Intrusive Thoughts and Rumination: Victims often replay the relationship, trying to pinpoint when it turned, or how they could have prevented it.

Depression and Emotional Withdrawal: The sense of loss is not just about money or a relationship. It is about the perceived death of something emotionally meaningful and once believed to be safe.

Neurological Impact

Neurologically, betrayal trauma activates the limbic system, particularly the amygdala, which governs fear responses. When betrayal is discovered, the brain treats it as a threat. This triggers the fight, flight, or freeze response, flooding the body with stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline. Over time, repeated stress from betrayal trauma can impair cognitive functioning and emotional regulation.

Key brain regions involved include:

• • • Amygdala: Overreacts to perceived threats, increasing anxiety and emotional reactivity.

    • Prefrontal Cortex: This area, responsible for reasoning and judgment, becomes less effective when cortisol is elevated. That can lead to poor decision-making, confusion, and impaired concentration.

    • Hippocampus: This structure helps regulate memory and context. Chronic stress from betrayal can shrink the hippocampus, disrupting memory processing and increasing the likelihood of intrusive flashbacks or ruminative thinking.

Additionally, mirror neurons, which allow you to emotionally connect with others, may become desensitized. This can make it harder to trust people again or feel safe in new relationships. Your brain may begin to generalize the betrayal, perceiving all connections as potentially unsafe.

Why It Feels So Shattering

The pain of betrayal trauma is amplified by the relational context. Human beings are wired for connection and survival through relationships. When that bond is broken through deception or exploitation, the betrayal is not just emotional—it is existential. It calls into question your ability to understand others, protect yourself, trust yourself, and even interpret reality.

This often leads to a breakdown of basic trust—not just in other people, but in your own emotions, instincts, and choices. That is why scam victims may report feeling not just devastated, but disoriented.

Long-Term Consequences

If not addressed, betrayal trauma can have long-lasting psychological and physiological effects.

These include:

Chronic anxiety or depression

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or complex PTSD

Avoidant or anxious attachment styles in future relationships

Trust disorders

Cognitive distortions about self-worth or safety

The good news is that the brain is adaptable. Through trauma-informed therapy, consistent support, and guided recovery work, victims can begin to retrain their nervous systems, rebuild self-trust, and restore emotional connection with others.

Betrayal trauma is not about weakness or gullibility. It is about how the human brain and heart respond when trust is weaponized. It is one of the deepest emotional wounds a person can experience. Understanding its psychological and neurological roots is the first step toward real recovery. Once you can see that your reactions are normal responses to abnormal violations, you can begin to separate the trauma from your identity and begin healing.

Recognizing Betrayal and the Trauma It Creates

One of the most important steps in recovery from a scam is recognizing that what happened to you was a betrayal. This may sound obvious, but many victims hesitate to call it that. You might tell yourself it was just a mistake, or you might try to rationalize the scammer’s behavior. You might even blame yourself. These are common reactions, but they prevent you from acknowledging the depth of the emotional damage caused by the betrayal.

Scammers do not just take money. They violate trust, exploit emotional vulnerability, and create an illusion of safety and connection, only to dismantle it. That is betrayal. When you fully recognize that truth, it becomes clear why the emotional consequences are so overwhelming. This kind of trauma is not just about a broken relationship. It affects your identity, your ability to trust, and your sense of reality. The longer you delay recognizing the betrayal, the more complicated and embedded the trauma can become.

This is why getting therapy and support is not optional. It is necessary. Relationship scams can result in the same trauma symptoms seen in survivors of abuse or emotional manipulation. Therapy gives you a place to process what happened with someone who understands the mechanics of trauma and how it affects your mind and body. A trauma-informed therapist will help you sort through the confusion, guilt, grief, and anger that betrayal brings. They will also help you begin to regulate your nervous system again, which is likely stuck in a state of high alert.

Support groups are also essential. Talking with others who understand what it means to be betrayed by someone who seemed to care can reduce feelings of isolation and shame. You are not alone. Many others have gone through this and are finding their way out. That shared experience can be grounding. It shows you that the pain is real but also survivable.

But healing requires more than just emotional processing. It also requires learning. You need to understand how scams work, how grooming unfolds, and how trauma reshapes your thinking. Education helps remove the fog. It brings clarity and control back into your life. When you learn about the patterns of manipulation, you stop personalizing the abuse. You stop asking what is wrong with you and start understanding what the scammer did and why it worked.

Learning also gives you the tools to prevent future harm. It teaches you how to spot red flags, how to rebuild boundaries, and how to listen to your intuition without being controlled by fear. It helps you turn your experience into knowledge, not just for yourself but eventually for others who need guidance and support.

Recovery is a process. It is not quick or easy. But it starts when you stop minimizing what happened and start treating it with the seriousness it deserves. You were betrayed. That betrayal caused trauma. You cannot wish it away or ignore it. You must face it, process it, and learn from it. Therapy and education are not signs of weakness. They are the foundation of resilience. They are how you move from being a victim to becoming someone stronger, wiser, and more in control of your life.

Warning

If you do not take the necessary steps to manage your trauma and recover after a scam, the consequences can be serious and long-lasting.

Unaddressed trauma does not disappear on its own. It often deepens over time, leading to chronic anxiety, depression, emotional isolation, and in some cases, suicidal thoughts. Relationships with family and friends can deteriorate as you push others away or struggle to control your emotions. Your sense of trust, both in yourself and in others, may remain shattered. Without support, unprocessed betrayal can trap you in a cycle of anger, guilt, or denial, making healing impossible. Many victims who avoid recovery fall into repeated scams, risky behavior, or destructive coping mechanisms. The cost of not healing is not just emotional, it affects every part of your life. Choosing to ignore trauma does not protect you. It keeps you stuck in the damage the scam created and allows the criminal’s impact to linger far longer than it should.

Please Rate This Article

Please Leave Us Your Comment
Also, tell us of any topics we might have missed.

Thank you for your comment. You may receive an email to follow up. We never share your data with marketers.

-/ 30 /-

What do you think about this?
Please share your thoughts in a comment above!