The Importance of Goal Setting for Scam Victims in Recovery
For Humans to Progress it is Essential that We Set Goals – Even More True for Scam Victims Trying to Recover from Scams
Primary Category: Scam Victim Recovery Psychology
Intended Audience: Scam Victims-Survivors / Family & Friends
Authors:
• Vianey Gonzalez B.Sc(Psych) – Licensed Psychologist Specialty in Crime Victim Trauma Therapy, Neuropsychologist, Certified Deception Professional, Psychology Advisory Panel & Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
• Tim McGuinness, Ph.D. – Anthropologist, Scientist, Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.
About This Article
Goal setting is an essential tool for personal progress and is particularly critical for scam victims navigating recovery. By shaping a roadmap for their lives, victims can overcome feelings of helplessness, regain confidence, and foster resilience.
Psychologically, goal setting builds self-efficacy, the belief in one’s ability to achieve desired outcomes, and reinforces a sense of agency with each small success. Neurologically, it activates the brain’s reward and planning systems, releasing dopamine to create motivation and strengthening neural pathways through neuroplasticity.
Practical strategies like starting small, being specific, and focusing on controllable actions provide structure and clarity, reducing stress and enabling victims to prioritize effectively. With thoughtful, achievable goals, scam victims can rebuild their emotional, financial, and psychological well-being, turning a painful experience into an opportunity for meaningful growth and transformation.
For Humans to Progress it is Essential that We Set Goals – Goal Setting Is Even More Important for Scam Victims Trying to Recover from Scams
PART 1: GOAL SETTING
The Psychological Importance of Goal Setting
Goal setting is more than just a tool for productivity—it plays a vital role in shaping a person’s psychology, influencing motivation, self-perception, and overall mental health. When we set and pursue goals, we create a roadmap for our lives, helping us navigate challenges and uncertainties. For individuals recovering from setbacks such as scams, setting clear and achievable goals can restore a sense of purpose and direction, which is crucial for emotional well-being.
Psychologically, goal setting builds confidence and self-efficacy—the belief in your ability to influence outcomes and achieve success. Each time a person sets a goal and works toward it, they create a narrative of progress and agency, countering feelings of helplessness or stagnation. Achieving even small goals reinforces the idea that change is possible, creating a positive feedback loop of motivation and accomplishment. This sense of forward momentum is critical, especially for those recovering from trauma or adversity.
Goals also provide a structure for decision-making and prioritization. Without clear objectives, people can feel overwhelmed by choices or unsure where to focus their energy. Setting goals helps organize thoughts and actions, reducing mental clutter and anxiety. This psychological clarity fosters resilience, as individuals are better equipped to tackle obstacles and maintain their sense of purpose during difficult times.
What Happens in the Brain During Goal-Setting
From a neurological perspective, goal setting activates key areas of the brain responsible for motivation, planning, and reward processing. The process begins in the prefrontal cortex, which plays a central role in decision-making, focus, and executive function. When you set a goal, the prefrontal cortex evaluates the steps required to achieve it and helps prioritize actions. This part of the brain essentially acts as the CEO of your mind, organizing thoughts and behaviors to align with your desired outcomes.
One of the most powerful effects of goal setting is the activation of the brain’s dopamine system. Dopamine, often referred to as the “feel-good neurotransmitter,” is released when we anticipate or achieve success. Setting a goal creates a sense of expectation, and working toward it triggers dopamine surges with each step of progress. This makes us feel rewarded and encourages us to continue pursuing the goal. Achieving even small milestones along the way reinforces this cycle, creating a neurological reward loop that keeps us motivated.
The brain also engages in a process known as neuroplasticity during goal pursuit. When we set and work toward goals, we strengthen the neural pathways associated with focus, discipline, and positive habits. Over time, this rewiring of the brain makes it easier to stay motivated and maintain progress. This adaptability is particularly beneficial for individuals trying to recover from negative experiences, as it allows them to replace old patterns of fear or self-doubt with new patterns of confidence and resilience.
The Connection Between Goals and Emotional Regulation
Another critical aspect of goal setting is its impact on emotional regulation. When people face uncertainty or trauma, they often experience heightened stress and anxiety. Goal setting helps mitigate these emotions by giving the brain a sense of control. Knowing what to focus on reduces feelings of chaos and unpredictability, which are common in moments of distress. The brain naturally seeks order, and having clear goals satisfies this need, promoting a sense of stability and calm.
Additionally, pursuing goals provides a healthy outlet for processing emotions. Working toward meaningful objectives shifts attention away from negative rumination and toward constructive action. This focus on forward progress helps regulate emotional responses and fosters a more optimistic outlook on life.
How Goal Setting Encourages Long-Term Growth
Setting and pursuing goals doesn’t just create immediate psychological and neurological benefits—it also supports long-term personal growth. By consistently working toward objectives, people develop essential life skills such as patience, perseverance, and adaptability. The brain learns to associate effort with reward, making it easier to tackle future challenges with confidence.
Moreover, goal setting fosters a sense of identity and purpose. When individuals define what they want to achieve, they create a clearer picture of who they are and what matters to them. This sense of purpose is critical for maintaining motivation and resilience, especially during difficult times. It reminds people that their actions are meaningful and that they have the power to shape their lives.
In essence, goal setting aligns the mind and brain toward a common purpose, reinforcing both psychological well-being and neurological functioning. For individuals working to rebuild after adversity, it is a transformative tool for recovery and growth.
PART 2: TIPS
Practical Tips for Effective Goal Setting: A Guide for Scam Victims
Goal setting is a vital tool for anyone working to rebuild their life after the emotional and financial turmoil of being scammed. When approached with clarity, intention, and adaptability, setting goals transforms the overwhelming process of recovery into manageable, meaningful steps. Scam victims, who often feel powerless or lost in the wake of their experience, can benefit greatly from thoughtful, achievable goals. Below, we delve deeper into practical strategies for creating and implementing goals that foster healing and empowerment.
Start With Small Goals
The key to effective goal setting lies in beginning with objectives that feel manageable and attainable. Recovery is often daunting, and scam victims may feel buried under the weight of shame, anger, or financial uncertainty. Setting overly ambitious goals, such as “Get my life back in a month,” can quickly lead to frustration and burnout when progress doesn’t happen as fast as expected.
Instead, focus on small, simple tasks that build momentum. For example, a goal like “Write in a journal for 5 minutes a day” might seem trivial, but it establishes a sense of routine and accomplishment. These small successes help reframe your mindset from defeat to empowerment, showing you that progress is possible—even if it’s incremental. Small goals also create a foundation for larger objectives, as they build confidence and demonstrate that recovery is a process, not an all-or-nothing event. Over time, these manageable steps lead to meaningful, lasting progress.
Be Specific in Goal Setting
Vague goals are difficult to pursue and even harder to measure, leaving you feeling uncertain about whether you’re making progress. Phrases like “Feel better” or “Move on” lack actionable steps and clear endpoints, which can make you feel stuck or directionless. Instead, focus on setting specific, measurable goals that provide clarity and structure.
For instance, a goal such as “Attend one support group meeting this week” or “Write down three things I’m grateful for every evening” defines both the action to take and the timeline for completion. These types of goals give you direction, helping you prioritize your recovery efforts while reducing uncertainty. Moreover, specific goals make it easier to track progress, which can be incredibly motivating. When you know exactly what you’re working toward and see evidence of your achievements, it becomes easier to stay committed to your recovery.
Focus on What You Can Control
One of the most challenging aspects of recovering from a scam is the sense of powerlessness that often follows. Victims may feel consumed by unresolved financial losses or frustrated by justice systems that seem out of reach. While these external outcomes are beyond your control, goal setting allows you to shift your focus to what is within your power.
For example, rather than setting a goal like “Get my money back,” which depends on factors outside of your influence, you could focus on actions like “Create a monthly budget to regain financial stability” or “Identify one area to cut expenses this week.” These goals empower you to take ownership of your situation and make positive changes, even in the face of uncertainty. By concentrating on what you can control, you restore a sense of agency and resilience, reminding yourself that while the past cannot be changed, the future is still yours to shape.
Celebrate Small Wins
Acknowledging and celebrating progress is crucial to maintaining motivation and confidence during recovery. The aftermath of a scam often leaves victims feeling defeated and self-critical, which can make it difficult to recognize the importance of small achievements. However, each step forward—no matter how minor—is a victory worth celebrating.
For example, if your goal was to “Reach out to one trusted person for support,” take a moment to acknowledge the courage it took to take that step. Celebrations don’t need to be elaborate; they can be as simple as treating yourself to something you enjoy, taking a relaxing break, or reflecting on your progress with pride. These moments of acknowledgment reinforce positive behaviors and remind you that recovery is happening, even if the journey feels slow. Celebrating small wins not only boosts morale but also creates a sense of forward momentum that carries you through more challenging times.
Adjust as Needed
Recovery is rarely a straight or predictable path, and the goals you set at the beginning of your journey may not always remain relevant or achievable. Life circumstances can change, and it’s important to be flexible and adapt your goals as needed.
For example, if a goal like “Attend three support group meetings this month” becomes overwhelming due to time constraints or emotional readiness, it’s okay to scale it down to “Attend one meeting this month.” Adjusting your goals doesn’t mean you’ve failed—it means you’re being realistic and prioritizing what works best for your current situation. Flexibility ensures that your goals remain supportive rather than stressful, helping you stay focused on forward progress. Remember, goal setting is a tool for empowerment, not a source of pressure. Adapting your approach as needed is a sign of resilience and self-awareness.
PART 3: EXAMPLES
15 Example Goals for Scam Victims in Recovery
Here are 15 realistic goals tailored to scam victims working toward emotional, financial, and psychological recovery. Each goal is explained in detail to provide clarity and purpose.
1. Reach Out to a Support Group
Joining a support group specifically for scam victims is a powerful way to connect with others who understand your experience. This goal fosters a sense of community, reduces isolation, and provides practical advice and emotional validation.
2. Report the Crime to Local Police and Federal Authorities
Taking the step to report the scam to your local police and federal authorities (such as the FBI’s Internet Crime Complaint Center in the U.S.) is an important and empowering goal. While not all reports result in direct action or the recovery of funds, filing a report contributes to broader efforts to track and combat scammers. It also establishes a record of the crime, which can be useful for legal or financial restitution later. This goal not only helps protect others but also fosters a sense of agency, showing that you are actively taking steps to address the situation and support justice.
3. Write in a Journal Daily for 5 Minutes
Journaling helps process emotions, reflect on progress, and identify patterns of thought. Setting aside 5 minutes a day is manageable and creates a safe space to explore feelings without judgment.
4. Research Scam Recovery Resources
Commit to finding reputable recovery resources, such as websites, counseling services, or financial advisors. This empowers you with knowledge and tools to navigate recovery more effectively.
5. Educate Yourself About Online Safety
Learning about cybersecurity and scam prevention is a proactive goal that helps rebuild confidence. It turns a negative experience into a learning opportunity, reducing the risk of future scams.
6. Reassess and Update Financial Plans
Create a new financial plan to address the impact of the scam. This could involve setting a budget, identifying expenses to cut, or seeking advice from a financial professional to regain control over your finances.
7. Set Boundaries on Talking About the Scam
Decide how much you’re comfortable sharing about your experience and with whom. Establishing boundaries protects your emotional energy and prevents retraumatization through unnecessary recounting.
8. Practice Daily Affirmations
Write and repeat positive affirmations like “I am worthy” or “I am rebuilding my life step by step.” This goal helps counteract feelings of shame or self-blame, fostering self-compassion and confidence.
9. Reconnect with a Trusted Friend or Family Member
Choose one person you trust and share your experience or feelings with them. This helps rebuild trust in relationships and reduces feelings of isolation.
10. Limit Time Spent on Worrying or ‘What Ifs’
Set a specific amount of time each day—15 minutes, for example—to allow yourself to worry or ruminate. Outside of that time, focus on actionable steps. This goal helps manage anxiety and prevents excessive mental strain.
11. Commit to Physical Self-Care
Scam recovery takes an emotional toll, so setting a goal to walk for 10 minutes, drink enough water, or get adequate sleep ensures you’re supporting your physical health during the process.
12. Learn to Recognize Emotional Triggers
Identify situations, conversations, or thoughts that provoke strong emotional reactions related to the scam. Understanding your triggers is the first step toward managing and reducing them.
13. Set a Weekly “Digital Detox” Period
Take one day or even a few hours each week to disconnect from screens, especially social media. This reduces exposure to triggers and provides mental space to focus on yourself.
14. Create a List of Small, Achievable Wins
Write down three to five small tasks you can accomplish daily, such as organizing one drawer or reading for 10 minutes. Checking off these wins builds confidence and momentum for larger recovery goals.
15. Celebrate One Achievement Every Week
Choose one thing to celebrate each week, no matter how small. It could be completing a task, attending a meeting, or simply feeling a little better. Celebrating progress reinforces a sense of accomplishment and optimism.
These goals are designed to address the emotional, financial, and psychological aspects of recovery while remaining realistic and manageable. Each one contributes to rebuilding confidence, reclaiming control, and fostering a sense of purpose.
Conclusion: The Building Blocks of Recovery
Goal setting is far more than a practical exercise—it’s a lifeline for scam victims striving to reclaim their lives. By starting small, being specific, focusing on what you can control, celebrating progress, and adjusting as needed, you can transform the daunting process of recovery into a structured and empowering journey. These strategies not only help you make tangible progress but also rebuild your confidence, sense of purpose, and belief in your ability to shape your future.
Recovery is not about achieving perfection or erasing the past—it’s about moving forward, step by step, toward a life defined by resilience and hope. With thoughtful goal setting, you can turn the pain of your experience into an opportunity for growth and transformation, reclaiming your power and building a brighter future.
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A Question of Trust
At the SCARS Institute, we invite you to do your own research on the topics we speak about and publish, Our team investigates the subject being discussed, especially when it comes to understanding the scam victims-survivors experience. You can do Google searches but in many cases, you will have to wade through scientific papers and studies. However, remember that biases and perspectives matter and influence the outcome. Regardless, we encourage you to explore these topics as thoroughly as you can for your own awareness.
Statement About Victim Blaming
Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.
These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.
Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at www.ScamPsychology.org
SCARS Resources:
- Getting Started: ScamVictimsSupport.org
- FREE enrollment in the SCARS Institute training programs for scam victims SCARSeducation.org
- For New Victims of Relationship Scams newvictim.AgainstScams.org
- Subscribe to SCARS Newsletter newsletter.againstscams.org
- Sign up for SCARS professional support & recovery groups, visit support.AgainstScams.org
- Find competent trauma counselors or therapists, visit counseling.AgainstScams.org
- Become a SCARS Member and get free counseling benefits, visit membership.AgainstScams.org
- Report each and every crime, learn how to at reporting.AgainstScams.org
- Learn more about Scams & Scammers at RomanceScamsNOW.com and ScamsNOW.com
- Learn more about the Psychology of Scams and Scam Victims: ScamPsychology.org
- Self-Help Books for Scam Victims are at shop.AgainstScams.org
- Worldwide Crisis Hotlines: International Suicide Hotlines – OpenCounseling : OpenCounseling
- Campaign To End Scam Victim Blaming – 2024 (scamsnow.com)
Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this and other SCARS articles are intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
Note about Mindfulness: Mindfulness practices have the potential to create psychological distress for some individuals. Please consult a mental health professional or experienced meditation instructor for guidance should you encounter difficulties.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
Also read our SCARS Institute Statement about Professional Care for Scam Victims – click here
If you are in crisis, feeling desperate, or in despair please call 988 or your local crisis hotline.
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It is really important to identify and set goals in the recovery journey, and this article is very helpful.