(Last Updated On: August 12, 2023)

Projection And Scam Victims

By Tim McGuinness, Ph.D. – Anthropologist, Scientist, Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc.

Projection Is A Psychological Defense Mechanism

It involves painting one’s own thoughts, views, feelings, and characteristics to someone else instead of seeing what is actually there!

With romance or other forms of relationship scams (including pig butchering scams) and their aftermath, psychological projection can play a significant role both during and after the scam.

Table of contents

Insights Into Victim Projection

During the Scam:

Scammers often use manipulation tactics to create a false persona that appeals to the victim’s desires and needs. Victims might project their own positive qualities, hopes, and expectations onto the scammer. They may perceive the scammer as the embodiment of their ideal partner, overlooking initial red flags or inconsistencies due to the projection of their own desires onto the scammer’s persona. Thus the victim’s own projection becomes an asset in the scammer’s grooming toolbox.

After the Scam:

Once the scam is revealed, victims might experience a range of emotions, including embarrassment, shame, anger, and self-blame. Psychological projection can come into play as victims struggle to accept their own vulnerability and mistakes. Instead of fully acknowledging their own emotions and actions, they might project their negative feelings onto others, including the scammer, law enforcement, or even themselves. For example, a victim might find it easier to believe that the scammer was truly in love with them but forced into the scam due to external circumstances, rather than accepting that they were manipulated. This projection allows the victim to preserve a more favorable image of the scammer, which can complicate the healing process. Additionally, victims might project their self-blame onto themselves, feeling that they should have seen the signs or should have been more cautious – of course, this is hindsight bias. This self-blame can hinder their emotional recovery and self-esteem.

Projection During Recovery

Psychological projection can affect scam victims during their emotional recovery in several ways too:

  • Denial of Reality: Projecting positive qualities onto the scammer or blaming external factors can prevent victims from fully accepting the reality of the scam. This denial can prolong or bypass the healing process and hinder their ability to learn from the experience and recover successfully.
  • Impaired Trust: Projection can lead to misplaced trust and skepticism. Victims might struggle to trust genuine people and relationships, fearing that they will again project their desires onto someone who doesn’t have their best interests at heart – assuming they are even aware that they are projecting. This is yet another reason why abstinence is important after the scam ends.
  • Interpersonal Challenges: Victims who project their negative feelings onto others might find it difficult to form new healthy relationships or seek support from friends and family. They may view others who are simply having a hard time understanding the nuances of the criminal’s manipulation as being judgmental and hostile.
  • Stifled Healing: Projection can interfere with the necessary self-reflection and processing of emotions (especially grief) that is crucial for healing. It can prevent victims from taking responsibility for their own emotions and decisions, causing them to ignore the need for professional help!.

Recovering from a romance scam involves coming to terms with one’s own vulnerability, learning from the experience, and rebuilding emotional well-being.
To do this effectively, victims should strive to recognize and address any tendencies toward projection, seek professional support if needed, and engage in a process of self-compassion and self-forgiveness. This can help them move forward with a clearer understanding of their emotions and a healthier perspective on relationships.

Summary

Remember, this is but one piece in the 1,000 piece jigsaw puzzle that is learning to recover! Some of you have a sense of the picture it presents, but newer victims are still looking for the corners! Have patience, you will find the pieces if you continue to follow the recovery path!

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PLEASE NOTE: Psychology Clarification

The following specific modalities within the practice of psychology are restricted to psychologists appropriately trained in the use of such modalities:

  • Diagnosis: The diagnosis of mental, emotional, or brain disorders and related behaviors.
  • Psychoanalysis: Psychoanalysis is a type of therapy that focuses on helping individuals to understand and resolve unconscious conflicts.
  • Hypnosis: Hypnosis is a state of trance in which individuals are more susceptible to suggestion. It can be used to treat a variety of conditions, including anxiety, depression, and pain.
  • Biofeedback: Biofeedback is a type of therapy that teaches individuals to control their bodily functions, such as heart rate and blood pressure. It can be used to treat a variety of conditions, including stress, anxiety, and pain.
  • Behavioral analysis: Behavioral analysis is a type of therapy that focuses on changing individuals’ behaviors. It is often used to treat conditions such as autism and ADHD.
    Neuropsychology: Neuropsychology is a type of psychology that focuses on the relationship between the brain and behavior. It is often used to assess and treat cognitive impairments caused by brain injuries or diseases.

SCARS and the members of the SCARS Team do not engage in any of the above modalities in relationship to scam victims. SCARS is not a mental healthcare provider and recognizes the importance of professionalism and separation between its work and that of the licensed practice of psychology.

SCARS is an educational provider of generalized self-help information that individuals can use for their own benefit to achieve their own goals related to emotional trauma. SCARS recommends that all scam victims see professional counselors or therapists to help them determine the suitability of any specific information or practices that may help them.

SCARS cannot diagnose or treat any individuals, nor can it state the effectiveness of any educational information that it may provide, regardless of its experience in interacting with traumatized scam victims over time. All information that SCARS provides is purely for general educational purposes to help scam victims become aware of and better understand the topics and to be able to dialog with their counselors or therapists.

It is important that all readers understand these distinctions and that they apply the information that SCARS may publish at their own risk, and should do so only after consulting a licensed psychologist or mental healthcare provider.

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