Cooking As Therapy For Scam Victims
Let Cooking Be a Pathway to Calmness and Control in Your Life!
Primary Category: Scam Victim Recovery Psychology
Author:
• Tim McGuinness, Ph.D. – Anthropologist, Scientist, Director of the Society of Citizens Against Relationship Scams Inc. and sometimes Wizard in the Kitchen!
About This Article
Cooking your own meals after experiencing a relationship scam can be a powerful therapeutic tool. It provides a sense of control, mindfulness, and focus that is essential for emotional healing.
The act of preparing and cooking your meals encourages you to be present in the moment, reducing stress and anxiety by engaging your senses and calming your mind. By choosing your own ingredients, you can opt for foods that promote mental well-being, such as whole grains, fatty fish, and leafy greens, while avoiding processed foods and those high in sugar, trans fats, and sodium, which can negatively impact mood and emotional regulation.
Additionally, cooking at home helps you avoid the stress and poor nutritional value often associated with fast food and dining out, further supporting your emotional recovery. This mindful approach to food preparation not only nourishes your body but also your mind, offering a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction as you create and enjoy nourishing meals.
Cooking as Therapy: Healing for Scam Victims After a Relationship Scam
After experiencing the emotional turmoil of a relationship scam, finding ways to regain control, calm your mind, and nurture your well-being is critical and cooking allows for this.
Cooking your own meals is a surprisingly effective method for healing after a scam. Through the simple act of preparing and cooking your own meals, you can set aside all of the stress and totally focus on what you are doing.
Cooking can be a therapeutic and cathartic experience, offering mindfulness, focus, and the opportunity to make healthier food choices that promote mental well-being.
The Therapeutic Power of Cooking
Cooking your own meals can be a deeply therapeutic activity, especially after the emotional stress of a scam. The process of selecting ingredients, following recipes, and focusing on the one task at hand can bring a sense of order and purpose to your day, it’s an act of mindfulness. This focus on the present moment helps induce a state of mindfulness, where you are fully engaged in the activity and less likely to dwell on past pain or future worries.
When you cook, you’re not just preparing food; you’re creating something tangible and nourishing for yourself (and your family.) This act of creation can restore a sense of control and accomplishment, which is often lost during traumatic experiences like being scammed. As you chop, stir, and season, you’re engaging in a ritual as old as human life since the utilization of fire, which can calm the mind and provide a much-needed distraction from negative thoughts.
Even if it is not perfect, just the doing is what matters!
Take Shopping Slowly
Taking your time when shopping for food is an essential step in fostering better health and well-being. By carefully selecting real, natural foods and avoiding heavily processed options, you provide your body with the nutrients it needs to function optimally. Real foods—such as fresh fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats—are rich in vitamins, minerals, and antioxidants that support mental and physical health. In contrast, heavily processed foods often contain artificial ingredients, preservatives, and unhealthy fats that can contribute to inflammation, weight gain, and mood swings. By prioritizing natural, whole foods in your shopping cart, you make a conscious choice to nourish your body and mind, setting the foundation for long-term well-being.
Mindfulness and Focus in the Kitchen
Mindfulness, the practice of being present in the moment, is a key element of mental well-being. Cooking naturally encourages mindfulness because it requires concentration and attention to detail. Whether you’re measuring ingredients, monitoring the heat, taste testing every stage, or timing the cooking process, you must focus on the task at hand. This focus can help quiet the mind and reduce the mental clutter (rumination) that often accompanies stress and anxiety.
The repetitive actions involved in cooking, such as chopping vegetables or stirring a pot, can be particularly soothing. These tasks allow your mind to settle into a rhythm, which can be calming and meditative. As you become more absorbed in the process, you find that your worries begin to fade into the background, giving you a break from the emotional aftermath of the scam.
Creative Satisfaction
There’s a deep sense of creative satisfaction that comes from preparing a meal and watching it come to life. From the moment you begin selecting ingredients to the final plating, you’re engaging in a creative process that allows you to express yourself and take control of your nourishment. Each step, whether it’s chopping vegetables, seasoning a dish, or arranging food on a plate, reflects your personal touch and intention. This act of creation is both fulfilling and empowering, as you transform raw ingredients into a delicious, nourishing meal.
Taking the time to savor the meal you’ve prepared adds another layer of satisfaction. By slowing down and truly enjoying each bite, you’re not only appreciating the flavors and textures of the food but also honoring the effort and creativity that went into making it. This mindful approach to eating enhances your connection to the meal, turning it into a moment of gratitude and self-care. It’s more than just feeding your body; it’s feeding your soul with the joy of creation and the pleasure of truly experiencing the fruits of your labor.
Choosing Foods That Promote Mental Well-Being
Another significant benefit of cooking for yourself is the ability to choose foods that support your mental health. Certain foods are known to have a positive impact on mood and emotional well-being.
For example:
- Whole grains, such as brown rice and oats, provide a steady release of energy and help stabilize blood sugar levels, which can prevent mood swings.
- Fatty fish like salmon and mackerel are rich in omega-3 fatty acids, which are essential for brain health and can reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety.
- Leafy greens like spinach and kale are high in folate, a nutrient that helps regulate mood and reduce the risk of depression.
- Berries are packed with antioxidants, which can help reduce inflammation in the brain and improve cognitive function.
By preparing your own meals, you can ensure that your diet includes these mood-boosting foods while avoiding processed and sugary options that can negatively affect your mental stability.
Dr. Tim’s Secret
Acai berries are often touted for their numerous health benefits, including their potential to stabilize mood. These small, dark berries are rich in antioxidants, particularly anthocyanins, which help reduce oxidative stress and inflammation in the brain. Reducing oxidative stress is important because chronic inflammation is linked to various mental health issues, including depression and anxiety.
Acai berries also contain essential fatty acids, such as omega-3 and omega-6, which are vital for maintaining brain health and may contribute to improved mood regulation. Moreover, they are a good source of fiber, which supports gut health—a key player in the gut-brain axis that influences mood and mental well-being.
While acai berries can be part of a healthy diet that supports mood stability, it’s important to note that they should be consumed as part of a balanced diet rich in various nutrients. Alone, they are unlikely to have a dramatic effect on mood but can contribute positively when included in an overall healthy lifestyle.
Avoiding the Stress of Fast Food and Restaurants
In the aftermath of a relationship scam, stress levels are already high. Eating out at fast food joints or restaurants can add to this stress, especially if the environment is noisy, crowded, or if the food is unhealthy. Fast food and restaurant meals often contain high levels of unhealthy fats, sugars, and sodium, which can contribute to mood swings, anxiety, and depression. Fast food drive-throughs are especially stress-inducing and should be avoided.
By cooking at home, you avoid the potential stressors of eating out and can control the nutritional content of your meals. This not only supports your physical health but also your emotional well-being. The comfort of your own kitchen provides a safe space where you can experiment with recipes, try new foods, and nourish yourself both physically and mentally.
Foods to Avoid
Certain foods can negatively impact mood and emotional regulation, especially when consumed in excess or as part of an unbalanced diet. Here are some key foods to avoid:
Sugary Foods and Beverages
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- Impact: High-sugar foods, such as candies, pastries, and sugary drinks, cause rapid spikes and drops in blood sugar levels. These fluctuations can lead to mood swings, irritability, and feelings of anxiety.
- Reason: The initial sugar rush is often followed by a crash, which can result in feelings of fatigue, low mood, and difficulty concentrating.
Refined Carbohydrates
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- Impact: Foods made from white flour, such as white bread, pasta, and pastries, can similarly cause blood sugar spikes and crashes, leading to emotional instability.
- Reason: Refined carbs are quickly digested, leading to a rapid increase in blood sugar followed by a sharp decline, which can negatively affect mood and energy levels.
Processed Foods
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- Impact: Processed and fast foods, such as chips, fried foods, and ready-made meals, are often high in unhealthy fats, sugars, and preservatives, all of which can contribute to poor mood regulation.
- Reason: These foods can cause inflammation in the body, including the brain, which is linked to an increased risk of depression and anxiety.
Artificial Sweeteners – Sugar is Better if you Have To!
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- Impact: Some studies suggest that artificial sweeteners, like aspartame and saccharin, can negatively affect mood and cognitive function.
- Reason: Artificial sweeteners may alter neurotransmitter levels in the brain, which can lead to mood disturbances.
Caffeine
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- Impact: While moderate caffeine consumption can boost alertness and mood, excessive intake can lead to anxiety, restlessness, and sleep disturbances, all of which negatively affect mood.
- Reason: Caffeine stimulates the central nervous system, and too much can lead to overstimulation, resulting in mood swings and anxiety.
Alcohol
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- Impact: Alcohol is a depressant that can disrupt the balance of neurotransmitters in the brain, leading to feelings of depression and anxiety, especially when consumed in large amounts.
- Reason: While alcohol may initially have a relaxing effect, its overall impact is to impair brain function, leading to worsened mood regulation.
Trans Fats
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- Impact: Trans fats, found in many fried foods, baked goods, and margarine, have been linked to an increased risk of depression.
- Reason: These unhealthy fats can lead to inflammation and interfere with the production of omega-3 fatty acids, which are essential for maintaining brain health and mood stability.
High-Sodium Foods
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- Impact: Foods high in sodium, such as processed snacks and canned soups, can contribute to hypertension and negatively affect the body’s stress response.
- Reason: High sodium intake can interfere with the body’s natural hormone levels, which can contribute to increased stress and anxiety.
Carbonated Beverages
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- Impact: Carbonated drinks, including sodas and sparkling waters, can lead to stomach acid imbalances, which may contribute to feelings of discomfort and irritability.
- Reason: The carbonation in these beverages can cause bloating and decreased stomach acid, which may lead to digestive discomfort. Digestive health is closely linked to mental health through the gut-brain axis, so discomfort in the stomach can negatively affect mood and emotional stability.
By avoiding or reducing these foods in your diet, you can help promote better emotional regulation and overall mental well-being. Instead, focus on a diet rich in whole foods, including fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean proteins, and healthy fats, which support stable moods and mental health.
Journaling
Take photos of your creations and add them to your journal entries or share them in your support group with pride! The act of cooking represents a step toward taking control back in your life and being mindful, all noteworthy in your journey of recovery!
AXIOS!
Summary
Cooking your own meals after a relationship scam is more than just a practical necessity; it’s a powerful tool for emotional healing.
The act of cooking encourages mindfulness and focus, providing a calming and therapeutic outlet for stress. By choosing foods that promote mental well-being and avoiding the pitfalls of fast food and restaurants, you can support your recovery and nurture your emotional health. Embracing the kitchen as a place of healing can help you regain control in your life, find peace, and move forward on your journey to recovery.
Recipe Ideas
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Statement About Victim Blaming
Some of our articles discuss various aspects of victims. This is both about better understanding victims (the science of victimology) and their behaviors and psychology. This helps us to educate victims/survivors about why these crimes happened and to not blame themselves, better develop recovery programs, and to help victims avoid scams in the future. At times this may sound like blaming the victim, but it does not blame scam victims, we are simply explaining the hows and whys of the experience victims have.
These articles, about the Psychology of Scams or Victim Psychology – meaning that all humans have psychological or cognitive characteristics in common that can either be exploited or work against us – help us all to understand the unique challenges victims face before, during, and after scams, fraud, or cybercrimes. These sometimes talk about some of the vulnerabilities the scammers exploit. Victims rarely have control of them or are even aware of them, until something like a scam happens and then they can learn how their mind works and how to overcome these mechanisms.
Articles like these help victims and others understand these processes and how to help prevent them from being exploited again or to help them recover more easily by understanding their post-scam behaviors. Learn more about the Psychology of Scams at www.ScamPsychology.org
SCARS Resources:
- Getting Started: ScamVictimsSupport.org
- FREE enrollment in the SCARS Institute training programs for scam victims SCARSeducation.org
- For New Victims of Relationship Scams newvictim.AgainstScams.org
- Subscribe to SCARS Newsletter newsletter.againstscams.org
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- Report each and every crime, learn how to at reporting.AgainstScams.org
- Learn more about Scams & Scammers at RomanceScamsNOW.com and ScamsNOW.com
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- Worldwide Crisis Hotlines: International Suicide Hotlines – OpenCounseling : OpenCounseling
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Psychology Disclaimer:
All articles about psychology and the human brain on this website are for information & education only
The information provided in this and other SCARS articles are intended for educational and self-help purposes only and should not be construed as a substitute for professional therapy or counseling.
Note about Mindfulness: Mindfulness practices have the potential to create psychological distress for some individuals. Please consult a mental health professional or experienced meditation instructor for guidance should you encounter difficulties.
While any self-help techniques outlined herein may be beneficial for scam victims seeking to recover from their experience and move towards recovery, it is important to consult with a qualified mental health professional before initiating any course of action. Each individual’s experience and needs are unique, and what works for one person may not be suitable for another.
Additionally, any approach may not be appropriate for individuals with certain pre-existing mental health conditions or trauma histories. It is advisable to seek guidance from a licensed therapist or counselor who can provide personalized support, guidance, and treatment tailored to your specific needs.
If you are experiencing significant distress or emotional difficulties related to a scam or other traumatic event, please consult your doctor or mental health provider for appropriate care and support.
If you are in crisis, feeling desperate, or in despair please call 988 or your local crisis hotline.
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